Waiting for people?

Why do people not give proper time estimates?

I’ve faced this problem with a lot of people. They say they’ll take 15 minutes when they actually take 45. They say they’ve left the house and will be there in 5 minutes when they are just going to go for a bath. This is not something you can give a benefit of doubt for - these time estimates are completely off the mark!

The question is – why do people do this. I can think of 3 broad reasons.

1. They think the other person is stupid and would not be able to figure out that they were lying. In which case they are stupid to discount other people so much.
2. They really have no sense of time and hence absolutely no clue as to how long will they actually take. In which case again I think they are a little light in the head and should try to look at the watch more frequently to get an estimate of how long they actually take. For e.g. how long do they actually take from thinking about taking to bath to reaching their friends place. Then they’ll be able to make better time estimates.
3. Or, they are too scared to admit right away that they are damn late and hence try to postpone admitting that. Again, doesn’t say very highly about them.

For some people, everything will take 2-5 minutes. People should realize the difference between 2 minutes, 5 minutes, 10 minutes and 30 minutes. It would help them in the long run.

New experiences

I recently had the opportunity to interact extensively with a new kind of people. The kind of people who, till now, I was easily able to avoid till now.

The kind which I didn’t like as they were not straight forward. This kind is unable to say anything directly and clearly. They will put up the most fake face in front of you. They’ll be all nice to you, but its not hard to see that things are not as they look. They cannot say anything directly. Everything will go in a round-about way.

What is interesting is that they are not even that good at putting up masks. You’d think that if they did it all the time, they would at least be good at it. But obviously they aren’t.

What is worse is that interacting with such people can make you bad too. You don’t feel like talking straight to them and giving it that easy. You intentionally want to twist it around for them – probably they love to twist as that is the way they would like it too!

I realized that I’d been able to conveniently avoid such people as I always had the choice to choose the people I want to make friends with/ live with. But in a foreign country that choice is often limited.